Tuesday, November 29, 2011

Bitter Sweet Symphony


'I hate my life, everything in India was so perfect. I left that for what? More money, comfortable life, what else?'..I did not know how to react. I had to wait for my friend to finish up before I said anything. It was just the both of us and I knew I had to handle this carefully.

Tears rolling, face full of frustration and words of anger. This was certainly not a case of failure. Let's call the person 'X'. I used to admire X's life, way too classier than mine. I never expected this to happen. X and breakdown - Never!!

For a moment, I began thinking about my life. I too miss being in India. I am missing the perfect set of friends I had there too. I miss them badly. It takes a moment to 'crack down' and it takes a moment to 'collect all the pieces and get up again'. Just that these moments never come together.

What if I would have been in India? Life would have not been the same, same thing about friends. Full time job is no 'Engineering college'. If loneliness has to strike you, it will strike you on the busiest street in the world. My friend knows all of this. Getting into trouble and coming out of it was nothing new for X but today was a different day.

What do I do, reach for the phone, call someone, talk to parents. But broadcasting would have done more harm than good. Nobody wants the ugly part of their life to be known to others. As I was thinking all of this, I realized that I had missed the last 5 sentences that 'X' had said. But I could sense that they were on the lines of 'How messed up my life is' types. You feel sad sometimes when people lose courage. It's not bad to fall into deep pit, it's bad if you lose the confidence that you'll come out of it.

I was thinking about things that could cheer 'X' up; trying to remember the things that cheered me up during my 'lows'. Once I had viral fever and I had to sit home all week while everyone else was off to the University. Made me homesick. My mom would have taken special care of me had I been back home. That day, 'a totally unexpected friend' made hot soup for me. That soup simply made my day and took away the homesickness.

I had no time to make food. I remembered about the 'Dairy Milk' chocolate in my pocket. It came from the parcel that dad had sent me from India. I had reserved it for someone's birthday that night. It was the right time to take that out. Yes it worked...I wonder how 'Dairy Milk' did the trick. Life's like that, 20 rupees is all you need to get out of shit! Dad send me more Dairy Milk, 'kuch meetha ho jaaye'.